Love encompasses an array of alluring and positive psychological and emotional states, from the strongest imaginable religious virtue, to the most simple sexual pleasure, the most sublime ideal. In love, there is no scope for conflict or jealousy, for it is reciprocal. In love there is no selfishness or vainglory; everything is based on self-love. Love brings up its head in every walk of life – in business, politics, social relationships, family relations, among friends and strangers alike, and even in the most mundane pursuits. Love is the basis of trust and faith, and without it, the world can sink to utter decay.
Love can be one thing, but at other times it may be another; sometimes lust is the overriding feature. Some people confuse lust and love, believing that they are one and the same, and sometimes one develops while the other is still in its latent stage. However, the fact is that love may have some aspects of lust as well.
People in love find themselves drawn to others for different reasons: physical attraction, long-term friendship, an interest in a particular art form or hobby, an uncommon sense of intimacy with another person, shared goals, shared future, and so on. These strong feelings might arise whenever we meet a new person who seems to be attractive to us, or when a friend leaves us, or when we observe another person with whom we feel an emotional connection. They might also occur when we are frustrated or annoyed by someone else, or when we are grieving the passing of a beloved pet. The nature of our relationships with these other people depends on the quality of these feelings – whether strong or weak, sweet or salty, and so on.
Love is also based on an emotional bond which is sometimes stronger than the bond that most couples form with their partners. This means that when a person falls in love with another person, he or she might want to spend as much quality time with this person as possible. This quality of the bond leads to the phenomenon of “chemistry” – a word which is often linked with sexual attraction, but which is actually a concept of love as well. Those who believe in love say that a relationship is a chemical reaction that occurs inside us when we feel a strong emotional connection to someone.
Scientists speak about the chemistry between two people as “adultery and love.” Basically, two bodies create a chemical substance (chemoline) that makes it possible for each of the partners to feel pleasure or pain. When we are deeply in love, our brains send messages to our nervous system (which is responsible for the eyes and the senses) in order to establish a long-term relationship. In a way, this is like having a kind of love language. However, there are differences between our “real” love language and the chemical language of love. For instance, we might speak to our partner in a “lovey-dovey” or “cuddle” voice, or we might show affection by snuggling up against them in a hug or a kiss.
On the other hand, our “chemical” language is not limited to physical affection. For example, we might say “I love you” when we mean “I love you back”. We may also say “pattycake” instead of “pattycake” when referring to someone’s sweet tooth. The same is true if you want to say “good morning” or “how are you?”